how you to family this is what I want you to do I want you to realize how good you really are okay I'm gonna help you do that because that's what I do I help the underdogs learn to love themselves cuz you know why because I was an underdog and I hated it then people used to pick on me and I hated it and I didn't know how to clearly define my boundaries and I hated it but I figured it out and that's why I'm here I want to show you what you can do to help you gain control of your boundaries so a wonderful youtube video viewer reached out to me and asked me to do a video on boundaries and workplaces they can be quite confusing so let me see if I can help you out there so as generally as codependence we do struggle with boundaries let's look quick recap because it's always important to pay attention to what really happened when we were being programmed by our family literally being microchipped literally being brainwashed to think a certain way lots of times we were born to dysfunctional people and dysfunctional people have don't have very good boundaries dysfunctional parents they're allowed to get angry but we're not they're allowed to feel feelings about why not they're allowed to say I don't like that but we're not we're supposed to act like this we're supposed to smile on cue why because it makes them feel better so our whole reality is not about us it's about them so it's really hard when you're when you're raised by people who have really sabotage your ability to say I think I feel I need and feel confident about that it's not so easy for us to like walk into relationships and be able to say mmm that doesn't make me happy this isn't working for me this isn't working out this relationship doesn't feel right I wish it did but it doesn't and I gotta go it's really hard firstly do that I mean I've learned how to do that really well by the way but anyway so I'm going to help you address some issues that work so let's say you are beginning to understand that part of certain conversations perhaps make you uncomfortable you know when I I don't work in an office I couldn't handle an office but plenty of Michael – and one of the things that usually comes up for my clients is that as they begin to become toxically clean emotionally clean they become aware that they don't want to hang out with certain people negative people and they don't want to take part in gossip in the office and and whatnot and that sometimes even bosses are are rude and they're pushy and obnoxious and it's difficult when you're an employee and the boss relationship for this video I'm going to address cowork – co-worker so let's say you're aware that you don't want to have negative conversations anymore and that what you put out is what you're attracting so the girl next to the cubicle is always complaining so she's always complaining about the girl down you know a few cubicles down and let's say she's rude and let's say she's obnoxious the first thing you have to do deal one is tune into self tune into self all day every day all day every day ask yourself how do I feel how do I feel how do I feel how do I feel all day every day so when you're at home and you're watching the news how do I feel if you don't feel good about what you're watching on television change the channel how do I feel how do I feel if your kids are engaging in a conversation and it's about the neighbor down the block you know you can tell them you know we've got to stop gossiping in the house and if they don't stop gossiping then move out of the kitchen remove yourself from that vibration in the workplace what I'd like you to do is again pay attention to how you feel how do I feel how do I feel how well I feel really lousy that this girl's talking about so-and-so doesn't really feel good okay except feel decide what you want to do about it except that you feel crappy that this girl is yapping about another person feel it like where do you feel where you're sensing that in your body really really important that you start paying attention to your GPS your chakra system what – telling you what vibrations are you sensing in your being and where is it coming so if you feel that your heart chakra say oh I feel it in my chest and oh my stomach feels uncomfortable on my head starting to pound like I just want to get away so let's say you just want to get away then you decide what you want to do maybe you can excuse the conversation say you know what let's say names Laura I don't know what name I use before you know what Laura not feeling good you know I'm just gonna get up and use the ladies room I'll come back in a minute you come back more is still talking about this conversation then you can say to heart because you're aware that you're uncomfortable with the conversation the goal is to end the conversation and take control over your vibration then you can say something like well if you don't want to have a problem with her I would suggest like trying to be go go about it and like the back door Condor way so I don't feel good I went to the bathroom you can say you know what Laura you know maybe we can talk about this in another time I'm really I'm having a headache I don't know why that I'm just getting a headache are you sure okay yeah and then she'll stop talking about it if you walk up to the cooler at work and you hear people are having nasty conversations with other people just you turn around what I do is when I go out to dinner with family and friends and you know I have a lot of fear-based friends and I don't judge them you know I don't expect everyone to be as enlightened as I'd like them to be you know because sometimes it gets a little lonely but um that's alright it's good but when I go out to go out to dinner with family and friends who aren't where I am you know so I'm done conversations are coming up in a lot of it's fear-based did you see what happened over there you see what's happened in this part of the world you see what happened in the news I'm like now I didn't I don't watch the news I'm not interested I can't change it I can only pray about it and my job is to hold on to my vibration I mean a lot of people aren't going to get that so this is what I do I most the time I say excuse me and I go to the ladies room so I immediately changed my vibration ayah I do not allow their atomic you know their electrons to it quantumly entangle with my electrons so I take control over my org field and I take myself room to the ladies room blush get myself together again now if I go back to the table and they're still talking about some crap what I do is I say to myself Lisa focus on lovely things focus on lovely things and I look in my environment for lovely things so I play this game with myself wow that's a beautiful coat I love the color of her hair Wow I love her shoes Wow this restaurant is beautiful even though they're talking and they're all getting quantum lay entangled might focus it is literally literally creating a different energy field for me and I sit in it and when I feel strong enough to come back into the conversation I say things like oh my god let me tell you what the kids said well let me tell you what the dogs did or you know what I just saw this funny show on YouTube this funny thing on YouTube or did you hear about this I am deliberately taking the conversation back on an upswing because for me to sit there I'm not having this conversation about death and dying and mores and stuff I'm just not doing it it makes me feel like crap and then what I go outside I get into a car accident bang because they jacked up my vibration ain't doing that there's plenty of people doing that look around I want to be different and obviously if you're watching my channel you want to be different so dear ones in terms of the workplace if you're if you're dealing with people who are argumentative you want to try to sidetrack those conversations by saying things like wow you sound very passionate about this this situation I admire that you know let me see if I can understand where you're coming from so that's one way to deal with someone who's abrasive so with people who are abrasive in the workplace you want to validate them remember every human being every human being especially the owner ones are looking to be validated and when you validate someone's emotions they immediately resistance to what you have to say goes down it's a communication skill and we don't know that skill because we would never listen to we would talk to we I'd listen to the crazy people in the house who always yelling and we had we was shut down so we never we were afraid of our feelings so even if we got upset we didn't have a common common common me saying be so well you sound really passionate about that what's up how can mommy help you with this what's really going on that's awesome so that's the kind of parent I hope you're striving to become because that's those the kinds of parents we need but I only bring that up because that's why we don't know how to say to people who are abrasive to us wow you sound very passionate about that you know wow from your from where you're sitting I can understand why you feel that way I'm not agreeing with that person I'm just saying if I saw it from their view there see I could understand why they feel that way so validate someone who is being upset that's not agreeing with them I can see that you're upset let me think about this for a little bit and let me Mull it over and maybe maybe maybe tomorrow you can I at you and I can set a time I'll text you or I'll call you and we can agree on a time to talk about this further so that's how you deal with an abrasive person in the in the workplace very commonly you have to be calm and to bring that energy into into the conversation and what should bring to the conversation so if you bring validation into conversation more than likely that person that you're dealing with will validate you in some way so keep that in mind if there are just you know negative conversations going on in the workplace like avoid them take control over your vibration pay attention to what's lovely at work I hope this has helped you dear one I really hope this has helped you because if it has that means we're gonna have more light bodies in the world and that's that's awesome that makes it a more beautiful place for me more beautiful place for my children my future grandchildren and of course yours please check out my teleclasses it's going to begin in two March a few more seats are left and my books at Devon a foundation on it's making me itch it's not good that's why I keep touching my face um in case you're interested my books are the road back to me my review on the codepen divorce loving the self affirmations and quantum tools to help you heal your life now dear ones I promise you if you listen to these books over and over and over and over and over your patterns will change our parents didn't know what the hell they were doing but it's up to us to figure it out and we can we are all divine beings and it's okay lots of us have made mistakes and this journey is about embracing all aspects of self all aspects of self because we only did bad things when we when we were unaware that's it once we become aware and we change those patterns it's all good luck gets better alright check out my stuff WWE healing self esteem comm and WWE adult child of Alcoholics calm bye

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